Should I Have Sex with My Ex?

I've been working on this episode for over six months, researching and waiting, and thinking and laughing. "Should" questions or statements are a very powerful way we organize our judgment of ourselves and others, a way of saying, there's shame if you don't behave the way I think you /should/. I don't like them. And I don't like being on the receiving end. I judge too. I catch myself in hypocrisy. Don't yuck, someone else yum. But there I am poking holes in the lifestyle or personal choices of others like I'm some sort of all-knowing guru of existence. I'm not. There isn't a should about whether or not you have sex with your ex. Unlikely that anything applies to everyone or all of time and place. Life is too diverse for a system of shoulds and musts. I think. So if I or you or someone else is sleeping with an ex or isn't -- all I ask is that you not pack shame onto that decision and stay curious. Support Sexplanations by becoming a sexpla(i)naut: https://patreon.com/sexplanations Chapters: 00:00 Intro 01:09 Benefits and risk factors of breakup sex 02:45 What does the research say? 03:23 Perspectives 04:07 My experiences with breakup sex 04:28 Takeaways 06:21 Bloopers Videos: Decisions, Decisions: How to Make Hard Choices! (ft. Dr. Lindsey Doe!) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lxWSGwJzDlY How to Break Up with Someone the RIGHT Way (ft. Dr. Lindsey Doe!) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NO_PyUrk1zs Break Up First Aid Kit https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wS1_K8JcZT0 Sources: https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/1474704920936916 https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/0265407509351035 https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/22946958/ https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10508-018-1268-6 https://www.elitedaily.com/p/is-having-sex-with-your-ex-unhealthy-a-new-study-makes-a-surprising-discovery-12612276 https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3115386/ https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/28485695/ https://www.forbes.com/advisor/legal/divorce/divorce-statistics/ https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC10001274/ https://www.bustle.com/wellness/things-no-one-tells-you-about-sex-with-your-ex https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/1474704920936916